MARMELODIAN: My Blog

About twenty five years ago, my oldest niece dated a young man from County Cork in Ireland. He was here in East Tennessee, attending veterinary school at the University of Tennessee, Knoxville. Dennis was the son of a hired man on a pig farm in Ireland. His dream was to become a horse doctor at a big race track. I haven't seen Dennis for several years and I don't know whether he realized his race track ambition or not, but I do know that he graduated from the UT Veterinary School and the pig farmer's son became a doctor.

I remember the first time I laid eyes on Dennis and his brothers. I saw them in Hill's Department Store, in Knoxville. At first encounter, I didn't realize that my niece was with these three strange looking fellows...strange because they all looked as if they had walked straight out of the 1800's--wooly, highwater pants with suspenders, newsboy caps and the pastiest, whitest complexions I'd ever seen. Fascinated and curious, I did my best to stare inconspicuously, but then, to my surprise, who should walk up and join them but my niece,
C----? I couldn't believe it! Where on earth, I wondered, did C----find these three guys?

Well, C----- was also a student at UT. She met Dennis there and was dating him. When I saw them at Hill's, the brothers were visiting Dennis and trying to figure out how they could stay in the states too. C----- introduced me to her three new friends. Lovely, lilting accents and manners. And actually, not bad looking, if you could get past the pallor and Victorian garb.

All three of these young men were quite taken with the abundance of junk at Hill's (out of business for some years now, but rather like a big dollar store when they were operating.) For three poor, country, Irish boys, the whole place was a wonderland. But the cheap trinkets at Hill's, I found out, paled in comparison to the wonderland of Kroger's Grocery Store. When Dennis saw Kroger's he thought he'd been transported to the land of milk and honey. The abundance and variety of food was overwhelming!

Dennis said that when he first arrived in the U.S., he could not believe it when he heard people asking, "What's for dinner?" Seems like a pretty ordinary question, right? Not to Dennis. That was a question he never heard back home. Why? Seems like the dinner menu never varied. Dinner was unfailingly pork, cabbage, potatoes, bread and tea. That was it, every day of the year. I began to understand the pasty, white complexions!

How different it is here!
I cook a lot. In fact, three meals a day. Breakfast for my kids, lunch for my husband and me, and dinner for all four of us. And my never ending dilemma is, "What shall I cook?" Seems like no sooner do we finish one meal than I have to start thinking about the next one. Too many choices? All that deciding, planning, shopping and cooking....sometimes it feels like a burden. I guess it's a burden I'm lucky to have.

And so my inner dialogue goes: Should I shop out of my well stocked freezer or hit the stores? Kroger's for lamb? Food City for fish? J&M's for prime beef or all natural chicken? Rice, polenta or potatoes? What kind of salad greens....or should I make slaw? Veggies, frozen or fresh from Mickey's? Milk or juice? You get my drift.....the choices, decisions and combinations are endless. And I AM thankful, really I am.

And so, I approach the feast of Thanksgiving, planning what to cook, but knowing that Thanksgiving is really not that different than most other days in this rich country--the majority of Americans sit down to what most of humanity would deem a feast just about every day. I thank the good Lord that no one in my family is hungry. In fact, we're a little too well fed, and our complexions are plenty rosy.

At this moment, I'm sitting at my computer, drinking my Black Silk coffee. It's about 8:33 a.m. in these beautiful Cumberland Mountains, the sun is shining on golden leaves outside my window and I'm thinking, "What shall I cook for dinner tonight?" It's decision time again....should I start thawing something from the freezer or opt for a trip to the grocery store later? It's a nice dilemma to have.

And hey, what's for dinner at your house tonight?

I've found myself thinking a lot about the death penalty in the last couple of days. For two reasons: One, John Allen Muhammad was executed last night in Virginia. Silent to the end, I guess we'll never know why he shot complete strangers, apparently at random, concealed from the trunk of his modified automobile. Second, on Monday, I finished reading Mikal Gilmore's book, Shot In the Heart, about his brother Gary Gilmore who was executed in Utah in 1971 by firing squad. After a life of petty crime and incarceration, Gary murdered two individuals in cold blood on successive nights in Utah. As in the case of Muhammad, Gary's victims appeared to be random....just unfortunate individuals who happened to tragically run into Gary's rage at precisely the wrong time. My interest in Mikal's book was piqued by Norman Mailer's telling of the same events in The Executioner's Song.

I can understand the arguments of death penalty proponents. Yes, I agree that some people's actions are so heinous that they are rightly judged to be unfit for society forever. I've no doubt that there are monstrous individuals who act without concience, indeed, with gleeful malice and enjoyment of the suffering they're able to inflict on others. Maybe it's a power trip, a megalomania that seeks to reinforce a perception of godlike power over victims. I don't know....I'm just rambling and wondering.

However, I do know that even though I agree that some individuals certainly DESERVE the death penalty, I would never want to be the executioner....the person who flips the switch, pulls the trigger, or administers the lethal injection (what prisoners refer to as the "Stainless Steel Ride.) Theoretically, I can agree with the death penalty, but as a practical matter, I could not possibly carry it out. And this is my point....I think that unless you are willing to PERSONALLY perform the necessary action to end a condemned life, unless you are willing to step forward and say, "I'll do it, I'll be the executioner," you're not REALLY FOR the dealth penalty.

And while I'm on the subject of executioners, I've got one more thought. In states that exercise the death penalty, why doesn't the governor carry out the sentence? The governor is the only one who has the power to bestow clemency. He should also be the only one with the power to snuff out a life. I think I read somewhere that while George Bush was governor of Texas, he averaged fifteen minutes in reviewing the merits of each death penalty appeal for clemency. I doubt that Gov. Perry alots even that much time. If the governors of the states were charged with actually carrying out the death sentence and acting as executioner, perhaps their reviews might carry a little more gravitas.

So, I suggest that we all ask ourselves if we would be willing to act as executioner. If you are, then you're a death penalty supporter. If not, maybe you just think you are.

Rest in Peace, Mr. Muhammad

I've just loaded my song "Stainless Steel Ride" on my music page. It's third down on the page. Enjoy! MM

Hi Everyone. I've got just a couple of things to say about going green. First, I want to tell you about the homemade cleaner I've been making and cleaning absolutely everything with. It's completely safe, non-toxic and if it's not organic, it's pretty close. Mix equal parts white vinegar, hydrogen peroxide, water and just a squirt of mild castile soap (I've actually been using a Burt's Bees baby wash instead of castile soap.) If you like, you can add a little bit of an essential oil for fragrance--sometimes I do, usually don't. Call me crazy, but I love the smell of vinegar. The beauty of this cleanser is that it's really effective, is anti-microbial and is completely safe to use around food. I even squirt it in my refrigerator and wipe it down. Also, you can use it to clean fruit and veggies. Did I mention it's CHEAP?
The second thing about going green is my Bizmo store. I notice all the time how everything seems to be over packaged in the markets. What a waste! What a lot of landfill garbage! So, I've decided not to print any more physical cds. There are still a few "Spirit Songs" cds available at CDBaby.com , but they're not nearly as inexpensive as the album download on Bizmo. I can sell the download cheaply because it doesn't cost nearly as much for me to produce.
Hey, and one last thing, I read recently that about 10% of the average household's electric bill is for running the clothes dryer. Guess what...I hung a clothesline on the side of my house. And you know what? I actually kind of enjoy hanging clothes up to dry. I also like to look out the window and see them....they look kind of homey, make me feel virtuous and remind me of when I was little and my mother hung everything outside. Be well and best wishes to all of you. Martha Maria

Hi everyone, I want to tell you that I'm in the process of building a new work/recording studio behind my house right now. I'm really looking forward to having my own dedicated music space outside of the little white house. I think my family's looking forward to it too! They've been incredibly patient for the last three years. Thank you Bob, Joe and Walker. Also, I'd like to mention another music site I've discovered called "Composer's Forum." Whether you're a composer or not, it's well worth visiting. There are some incredibly talented new composers on that site, doing all kind of neat things (game and video music, film, tv, anime, etc.) I've been pretty amazed to hear what some of them are doing with computers and virtual instruments. Also, amazed at their generosity. Many of them have shared their expertise and knowledge with me, giving me all kinds of advice and specs on computers, sound cards, software, etc....whatever I might need to get started with my own little set up. I have to say, I have met the nicest people on the internet. The internet connections I've made have confirmed what I've always believed....there're an awful lot of really nice people in the world. And that's all for now. Good night, all you really nice people. Martha Maria

I'm reading DINA'S BOOK, a novel by Herbjorg Wassmo, a Norwegian writer. It was a bestseller in Europe, and is available in English translation from Black Swan Press. It's really kind of a magical book. Anway, I wanted to share a quote that comes early in the novel--Dina is a cellist. Here's the quote: "Being able to play music well isn't the same as the art of making sounds that touch people's hearts. Music has a soul, just like human beings. It also must be heard..."
'You have that art,' Dina said firmly.
'Thank you,' said the tutor with a slight bow. As though he were in a concert hall, with a princess in the front row."

That's what I strive to do, everytime I write a new lyric or compose a new melody....to make music with soul and sounds that touch people's hearts. I hope my music touches your heart! Martha Maria

As you probably already know, A Course in Miracles is a Christian/Metaphysical treatise on love and forgiveness (published by the Foundation for Inner Peace) that was channeled to Dr. Helen Schucman (by a voice that she identified as being Jesus Christ) and transcribed by Dr. William Thetford between 1965 and 1972. A couple of years ago, a friend of mine asked me to go to her "Course In Miracles" study group at the Center for Attitudinal Healing in Knoxville, Tenn. I had studied the Course in Miracles at a Unity Church some years before but no longer was part of a group. Anyway, I went with her and while I was there, somebody said, "I wish we had something like a rap or a song to help us remember all this stuff." And really, it was like a little bell went off in my head, and I heard a voice say, "I can do that!" I didn't conciously think anything more about it, but the next morning I was in the Kroger parking lot when the first words and melody came to me. I headed straight home to my recording studio. The rest of the cd was written and recorded in the next couple of weeks. The whole project seemed to be enchanted--everything just seemed to go right and magically fall into place. When it was finished, I sold the cd to the members of the Attitudinal Healing group and then kind of put it aside to pursue other musical interests. I didn't think much more about it until a couple of months ago, when I read a quote by Marianne Williamson on the Oprah Spirit Letter--something to the effect that some projects choose you rather than you choosing them. When I read that, I remembered how I had felt chosen to do the "A Course in Miracles" songs and decided maybe it was time to publish my "Miracle" music more widely. I took my original recordings and asked the great Randall Merryman in Nashville to master them for me. Randall worked his magic and so here I am-- and that's how my cd "Spirit Songs" came into being. The whole project has been a blessing to me and I hope it will be to you as well.